


For professional use only

by MaskedDragoness



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist (Anime 2003), Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Because of Reasons, Chatting & Messaging, Fluff, How Do I Tag, Humor, Multi, Not Beta Read, Parental Royai, Spoilers, absolute bastards, damn ok, oh shit i can tag now, riza is best mom, roy just dropping pickup lines like the whore he is, we stan the mustang unit, will roast u doe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-21
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-03 20:21:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 4,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24831538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaskedDragoness/pseuds/MaskedDragoness
Summary: ***THIS WORK IS ON HOLD**Bird: You aren’t done your paperwork, sirMustang: How do you know??Bird: Im sitting right behind you,,Mustang: ohMustang: can i incinerate themMustang: The papersBird: That does not count as doing your work, sir__________________________________Or, the chaotic FMA group-chat fic you didn't know you needed, set in a modern setting in an AU where Ed didn't lose his ability to do alchemy! This takes place maybe 6-ish months after the promise day, so spoilers beware!I HAVE AN ASK BOX AT :maskeddragonessfma.tumblr.com- Is there something you want to see me write? A scenario you want me to put these dumbasses through? Drop me an ask, im available and will respond to your post within 48 hours.
Relationships: Alphonse Elric & Edward Elric, Alphonse Elric & Riza Hawkeye, Edward Elric/Winry Rockbell, Mei Chan | May Chang/Alphonse Elric, Riza Hawkeye & Roy Mustang, Riza Hawkeye/Roy Mustang
Comments: 13
Kudos: 51





	1. Squad assemble

**Author's Note:**

> Hey gamers! Take my bullshit and my first fanfiction! Im a dumbass so lets make them dumbasses too B)
> 
> Im gonna add plot. Soon. I promise, Dont hate me 
> 
> Speaking of plot, if you have, ANY ideas of what you want to throw at me, Ill open up a tumblr where you can request stuff! Tysm guys <3 ilu and I hope you have a wonderful day/night

[Mustang added Bird, NOT short, and Transformer to the chat]  
[Mustang renamed the chat Squad]  
(9:00am)  
Mustang: Hello everyone! I have decided to make the decision to start a groupchat so we can communicate easier for missions. This can definitely help us with missions and alerts, and allow better professional communication lines between all of us!

Bird: Sir, sorry to disappoint, but I doubt this will be in the least professional.

Mustang: Buzzkill.

Transformer: Hello everyone! How are you guys holding up? I haven’t seen you all in a while!

Bird: Hello Alphonse! Good to hear from you, me and Colonel have been spending most of our time dedicated to recovery of Central and the surrounding area :)

Mustang: Look here dammit, if its not gonna be professional, then at least drop the formalities

Bird: Fine, what do i call you

Mustang: Hot stuff

Bird: I have now decided to call you “whore”

NOT short: AKKDFKSJKDFKSDFK RIZA

Mustang: …

Mustang: Touche  
NOT short: Hey uh winry demands to see this chat, is that all good?

Bird: I doubt we would be sending classified info over this chat, since it doesn’t have great encryption, so sure!

Mustang: hahah simp

NOT short: I AM NOT

Bird: Sir, you need to stop embarrassing him, hes only a teenager

Mustang: Im being attacked

Transformer: its ok ed, its obvious

NOT short: betrayal

NOT short: anyway, fuck you, adding her now

[Drink your FUCKING milk has been added to the chat by NOT short]

Drink your FUCKING milk: hey everyone :) what the fuck

Bird: Hi winry!! Its me, Riza! 

Drink your FUCKING milk: :O actually? Im so excited to see you

Bird: I feel appreciated im adopting her

Transformer: who is the father

Mustang: me

Bird: With all due respect sir, i will drop kick you to the moon

NOT short: Oh DAMN

NOT short: riza taking shit from absolutely no one

Bird: at least ed learned his lesson

Mustang: Is that a callout post

Bird: possibly

Mustang: :o

NOT short: istg their dynamic gives me life

Transformer: Agreed, brother

Drink your FUCKING milk: almost as much as a callout post my name is @NOT Short

NOT short: >:0

Mustang: Maybe this wasnt a good idea

Bird: Maybe, but whatever it is, its too late now sir


	2. whipped™

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Car: i wish i could be in Rizas apartment
> 
> Transformer: …
> 
> NOT short: …
> 
> Winree: ....
> 
> Bird: …
> 
> Bird: Im not going to respond to that

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey im back! I have time this month! And I'm like, what, 5 chapters ahead of what i am posting atm, so I may be able to post a chapter daily because I love everyone and I enjoy writing this!

(11:02am)

Mustang: Hey do you guys wanna go out for lunch or smthn

Bird; You aren’t done your paperwork, sir

Mustang: How do you know?? 

Bird: Im sitting right behind you,,

Mustang: oh

Mustang: can i incinerate them

Mustang: The papers

Bird: That does not count as doing your work, sir

Drink your FUCKING milk: Why are you two texting if you are right next to eachother

Mustang: Because I can

Bird: So I can expose him

Drink your FUCKING milk: Riza that is entirely valid

Transformers: oh hey guys, yeah im out grabbing some food with ed

Bird: wait hold on, 

[Riza changed Mustang’s nickname to “Car”]

Car: riza what the fuck

Bird: :) Alphonse, where are you boys? I might want to meet up with you

Car: NO FAIR

Bird: get ur paperwork done,

Transformer: We are at The Grind, its a Cafe a few blocks from central 

Car: dammit im working riza, ill meet you guys there like in 16 hours when i finish

Bird: Finish half of that stack in the next 20 minutes and ill pay the bill, sir

Drink your FUCKING milk: Miss Riza, I don’t think you know what you just agreed to

Bird: Im gonna regret that, aren’t I

Transformer: Probably

Bird: Im heading over to The Grind now 

NOT short: lmao the grind

NOT short: honestly a great name

Transformer: Alright, see you!

Drink your FUCKING milk: Wish i could come guys! But I do have a surprise!

NOT short: You better hurry the scones here are fucking DELICIOUS 

Drink your FUCKING milk: istg ed when i move to central i will whoop your ass

[Drink your FUCKING milk changed their name to winree]

NOT short: wait a second, hold on, uh wait hold on

NOT short: you are doing

NOT short: you are doing WHAT

Bird: wait actually? Thats awesome! Do you need somewhere to stay? I can let you stay in my apartment?

Winree: Yeah! Im moving to central to be closer to you guys. I rented an apartment already. I really miss you guys <3

Car: i wish i could be in Rizas apartment

Transformer: …

NOT short: …

Winree: ....

Bird: …

Bird: Im not going to respond to that

NOT short: yeah colonel, do your paperwork

Car: im almost done lay off, full metal

[Private message to Musty from Full Metal Headache]

Full Metal Headache: bro you w h i p p e d no lie

[SQUAD] 

Bird: I wanna hear more about Winry’s relocation!

NOT short: you make it sound like shes part of the military jfc

Bird: *shrug*

Winree: I'm moving next week, it was gonna be my surprise for you, but i guess I already blew it’

Winree: Best of all, I rented it on the same floor as Ed and Al!

Transformer: Thats awesome! What about pinako though? Is she going to be fine?

Winree: Yeah lol, shes actually adamant about taking care of herself 

Bird: Well its really great to hear, I cant wait to see you all! 

Transformer: ^^^^

Winree: wait can i just

[“Winree” changed “Transformer”s name to “Cinnamon roll”]

Cinnamon roll: oh, ok! :)

Winree: he is,,, too soft for this world

NOT short: agreed

Bird: Im here, where are you guys

Cinnamon roll: In the back, hold on im waving

Bird: I see you! Coming over!

NOT short: E🅱️ic

(11:45)  
Bird: Oh shit these scones are good

Car: IM DONE

Bird: i dont believe you

Bird: I need a picture

Car: Ifinishedmotherfuckers.png

Bird: why are there ashes in the back

Car: uh

Car:uh

Car: irrelevant

Bird: alright, but its not my fault if Olivier armstrong kicks down your door tomorrow morning and assaults you

Car: i- Ok

NOT short: mustang haul ur ass over here before your lunch break is finished

Car: dont need to tell me twice

Bird: uh

Bird: Sir, I hope you don’t pardon me asking, but, is that, you

Bird: running, with your uniform on, laughing like a fucking maniac

Bird: screaming, “I GOT MY PAPERS DONE! AT LONG LAST!”

Car: maybe

Bird: sir you ran past the door

Car: Dammit

Car: im here, i think

Car: yeah i see u


	3. winry says no parties

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NOT short: YEAHHHH DRINKS
> 
> Winree: ed im bringing my beating wrench with me
> 
> NOT short: NOOOOO DRINKS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :) have fun

(1:00pm)

Cinnamon roll: You were right, brother! Those scones were awesome! 

Winree: did you ask for the recipe ed?

NOT short: no, y

Winree: I could have, made some for you 🥺

NOT short: fuck

Cinnamon roll: *queue Ed running all the way back there, barging in and demanding the recipe*

Winree: ed, do NOT. I’ll get it when I move in

Car: speaking of which, we need to throw a party

Winree: you dont need to-

Car: WITH DRINKS

Bird: COLONEL NO-

Car: COLONEL YES

Cinnamon roll: Sorry Colonel, but I think i need to side with Lieutenant, we are minors

NOT short: YEAHHHH DRINKS

Winree: ed im bringing my beating wrench with me

NOT short: NOOOOO DRINKS

Bird: Iconic- How about we make a compromise. Drinks for the adults and food for kids because. Why not

Car: we cant just, have us though, right? That's no party :(

NOT short: I know some people >:)

Bird: What about a reunion?

Car: I could get behind that

Winree: no. Party. No. Reunion. Dont!! go through the work for it

NOT short: ugh f i n e i wont

[Direct Message between Midget and Took Your Food]

Midget: hey ling, how's everything holding up in Xing?

Took Your Food: Oh hey ed! Long time no see, or speak, or text, honestly? Idk. 

Midget: Good to hear,

Midget: hey can i ask a favor?

Took Your Food: yeah, shoot

Midget: can you come down to amestris in a week

Took Your Food: yeah, thats short notice but I think I can make it? How long do you need me there? And will there be food.

Midget: Stay as long as you want, I dont wanna burden you. We just wanted to hold a little reunion, you know? If you could bring Mei and Lan Fan?

Took Your Food: That works! Ill be there!

Midget: hell yeah

[Squad, 2:00 pm]

NOT short: i may have invited some people

Winree: explain

NOT short: :) its a surprise

Winree: You little motherfucker


	4. Fuck you winry we are doing one anyway

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dyson Fan: wait so who is everyone, and have I met these people
> 
> Car: Roy Mustang, at your service, professional hot bitch
> 
> Bird: Riza hawkeye, professional Roy Mustang babysitter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaa late post! I have a tumblr now! Check it out here: 
> 
> maskeddragonessfma.tumblr.com
> 
> I have my ask box open! hmu with requests about this fic or if you are interested in me doing a separate one- I can actually write other stuff too <3
> 
> Tysm for reading and I hope you drop an ask in there!

[NOT short added Bird, Car, Cinnamon bun, No Speak English, Dyson fan, and Panda to a New Chat]  
[NOT short named this chat Surprise party]

(2:03 pm))  
Dyson Fan: Excuse me, whats this

NOT short: Hey guys so we are, planning a surprise reunion for Winry

NOT short: just because shes moving to central

Car: whipped

Dyson Fan: wait so who is everyone, and have I met these people

Car: Roy Mustang, at your service, professional hot bitch

Bird: Riza hawkeye, professional Roy Mustang babysitter

Cinnamon bun: Alphonse elric! :D

Panda: ALPHONSE? How did i not have your number? Its mei

Cinnamon Bun: ohmygoshhi

Panda: (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ 

Cinnamon Bun: ✧ﾟ･: *ヽ(◕ヮ◕ヽ)

Dyson Fan: thank you guys!

No Speak English: I appreciate the wholesomeness

No Speak English: But first, I want you to know, that as I am a prince, this party needs to be fucking fantastic

No Speak English: I will make this the best party known to all of amestris

Car: and where would we hold it, we just have an apartment

Lan Fan: The young prince will find a way!

No Speak English: A shit load of money can buy you anything

NOT short: sometimes I think that greed just still might be in there, somewhere

Bird: So, are we gonna buy out the whole apartment floor?

No Speak English: yes

Bird: To be frankly honest, I was not expecting that answer.

Panda: So, I think we can all come. Are we bringing others?

Car: Riza should I invite the Mustang gang

Bird: is that what you call it sir

Car: yes. And im inviting them

Panda: do we know them?

Cinnamon roll: Im pretty sure, from the Promised day, when we worked together in front of central!

NOT short: you mean when WE worked together and you just straight up passed out

Panda: (ง'̀-'́)ง he literally got your arm back, ed, be grateful

No Speak English: yeah ed

NOT short: fine sorry 

Cinnamon Roll: its ok brother

Car: Ok so i ran it by The Boys ™️

Car: So we can help you guys set up + stuff

Bird: Lies, you just want to drink

Lan Fan: So if this is a surprise, that means Ed cant spill it, right

No Speak English: OOF, low blow

Panda: ⚆ _ ⚆ can we get a rip in the chat

No Speak English: Rip

Cinnamon bun: Rip

Bird: Rip

Dyson Fan: Rip

Car: Rip

NOT short: :( 

[Squad]

(3:39pm)

Winree: so that silence im taking as something ominous

Cinnamon Roll: No! Not at all, we just

[Direct message between Thing 1 and Thing 2]

Thing 1: Dont fucking spill it al

Thing 2: But I feel bad

Thing 1: Ill ban you from winrees pie

Thing 2: you dont have the right??? To do that??

Thing 1: Ill find a way

Thing 2: :( ok, just what if we are hurting her feelings? I feel bad!!!

Thing 1: She would hate us more if we spilled it

Thing 1: Just, lets keep it a surprise

Thing 2: Ok, we just gotta make sure to not neglect her or anything

Thing 1: ofc

[Squad]  
(3:42 pm)  
Winree: just what?

Cinnamon Roll: We wanna make you feel welcomed! :)

Winree: oki! Thank you <3

Cinnamon Roll: yw!

Car: tooth-rotting sweetness

Bird: Sir, just let them vibe

Car: I told you to stop using sir, 

Bird: well, i’m actually not going to use “whore”, i have more respect for you than that

Winree: riza, that is admirable, but why

NOT short: they made eachother a promise to help colonel reach the top

Car: uh

NOT short: For redemption in ishbal because of the guilt they felt and the weight they had to bear

Car: riza why does he know this

NOT short: She low key told me your whole life story 

Car: Lieutenant i didn’t authorize you to say that

Winree: thats super wholesome though! :)

Cinnamon Rolls: Respect +

NOT short: Honestly I really look up to that

Winree: same

Car: I’m- 

Car: lieutenant

Car: she's smirking at me guys what do i do

NOT short: your paperwork

Winree: yes ed kick his ass

NOT short: I learned it from you

Winree: :) 

Car: you know what scares me? Is that a girl from risimbool can absolutely KO one of the world’s top state alchemists with nothing but a wrench and make him fucking cry, hes endured losing limbs and being impaled by a fucking metal beam, but its nothing compared to winrys wrench

Car: Where did you get your battle training

Winree: You learn a few things out here

NOT short: the wrench, its,,,,,, so painful

Cinnamon roll: i have seen it, and I can attest to that as well, unfortunately

Car: I’ve got to go, SOMEONE is screaming at me

Car: See you! And dont get into trouble

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for making this longer! I had to smacc two of the chapters together because they were both too short. That being said, this puts me only 2 chapters ahead of schedule, so bear with me as i quickly write the next few! Ill be checking my ask box all morning tomorrow- PlEAse i need inspiration


	5. mom riza

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No Speak English: lan fan i.,,, didn’t mean that literally
> 
> Dyson Fan: how can you be attacked fugitivley
> 
> NOT short: fugitivley
> 
> Panda: fugitivley
> 
> Car: fugitivley
> 
> Cinnamon roll: fugitivley
> 
> No Speak English: fugitivley
> 
> Bird: fugitivley
> 
> Dyson fan: ah, like that

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :D today's chapter, ily all. Reminder that my ask box is open at https://maskeddragonessfma.tumblr.com/
> 
> please, please, please i crave requests, even if you want me to do a fic other than this, Ill take one shots, ect. Even feedback in the comments or there are appreciated.

[Stale Chips]  
4:23 pm)  
Havoc: Ok so this reunion thing

Dog Person: You mean the one that boss just invited us to?

Havoc: yeah that one, I heard a rumor that someone is buying out the whole fort

Veto: It may be that Ling kid,

Havoc: all that aside, i say we make bets

Bread: This is, a kids party

Havoc: they arent like 8 lmao they're like 17

Havoc: They’ll be fine

Dog Person: if you say so, but what are the bets

Bread: we already know Riza can out drink all of us

Veto: ^

Havoc: someone get her drunk doe

Dog person: Are you sure this is a good idea

Havoc: probably not but I vote we bet on how many shots it takes for riza to get drunk

Bread: im mildly interested, but as i said, its gonna be a challenge

Dog person: I guess as long as boss is involved tho she may try to out drink him? He gets drunk easily though

Dog Person: also i feel mean for doing this

Bread: you don’t need to place bets, I mean, me and havoc could do it

Havoc: i can do that

Veto: I would actually feel better if that was the case

Dog Person: We are great employees :)

Veto: anyway i cant bet negative on roy

Dog Person: oof

Havoc: oof

Bread: oof

Bread: ok so my guess is that riza can out drink us by like,

Bread: wait whats the medium

Havoc: Wine, I think, is her favorite

Bread: Im not good at maths, I dont want to convert beers and stuff, can we just bring wine, and that is all

Havoc: yeah, alright, I say that we don't get Colonel drunk until after we get hawkeye drunk, he’ll probably place bets 

Havoc: I think we can get her drunk in like 3 glasses? 

Bread: hell no, more than that, im going for like 6

Dog Person: How are you even?? Going to get her to drink that much

Veto: Mustang

Dog person: i- 

Dog Person: good answer

Bread: you all better be there for this shitshow

Veto: yes sir

Bread: havoc that means no surprise dates

Havoc: i wouldn’t miss it for even that

[Suprise party]

(6:15pm, June 21)

Car: Ok so, when exactly

Bird: Wednesday, its sunday now

Car: can we bring games

Bird: if you can think of non-drinking games, sure

No Speak English: Mario Kat

No Speak English: wait i meant mario katy

No Speak English: mario kary

No Speak English: mario katy

Dyson Fan: young prince, is everything alright?

No Speak English: katy

No Speak English: katy

No Speak English: jfc 

NOT short: what is going on

No Speak English: MARIO kATY

No Speak English: KATY

No Speak English: SASHDHSKDFKJDKD

Cinnamon roll: are you alright

No Speak English: m a r i o k a r t

No Speak English: fucking,,, spell check

NOT short: Mario katy

Bird: mario katy

Car: mario katy

Cinnamon roll: mario katy

Dyson Fan: Mario Katy

Panda: mario Katy

No Speak English: >:(

No Speak English: being attacked

Dyson fan: where, young prince, how can I defend you

NOT short: OOF

No Speak English: lan fan i.,,, didn’t mean that literally

Dyson Fan: how can you be attacked fugitivley

NOT short: fugitivley

Panda: fugitivley

Car: fugitivley

Cinnamon roll: fugitivley

No Speak English: fugitivley

Bird: fugitivley

Dyson fan: ah, like that

Dyson Fan: ok but real talk, we need someone organizing this

Bird: I will!

NOT short: Riza is best mom 2020

Cinnamon Roll: agreed

Dyson Fan: ^

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading, I got to go sleep, gn gang <3
> 
> also cheers to the Stale Chips chat, I love the mustang unit, they are gonna actually do shit in this fic, aka best wingmen ever


	6. absolutely NOTHING

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Car: tysm ilu
> 
> Bird: save it for later, Sir
> 
> No Speak English: :flushed: did i miss something
> 
> Bird: absolutely not. 
> 
> Car: :(

[Suprise Party]

Bird: OK everyone. Pay attention. We are bringing wine for the adults, aka our office, no touching. Mario kart can be hooked up by lan fan, who actually knows how to operate technology. Alphonse and Mei, you guys are on snack duty. Ling, I need you to buy out the floor now, there is a lobby on the floor I scouted out and we can vibe in there. The apartment complex is already pretty empty, so we can use the space. Colonel, I need you to pick up decorations. Ill be overseeing this all. 

{Bird pinned a message to this chat}

NOT short: well shit

Bird: and DONT LET WINRY see you. 

Cinnamon roll: Alright, sounds good, when should we head out?

Bird: asap, go grab snacks

Car: can i buy drinks

Bird: no, you arent responsible, Havoc told me he would get them for me

Car: :( fine

NOT short: right now we are free, i can go grab stuff with al

Dyson Fan: you guys are already in central right

Cinnamon Roll: Actually we are in Dublith rn but we can grab stuff here? We aren't far from central 

Cinnamon Roll: There are some good bakeries here we can snatch stuff from

Bird: That works fine, alphonse, grab what you can, put it on Colonel’s tab

Car: wait 

Car: what

Bird: Im not paying, I payed for your lunch

Car: Valid, whatever put it on my tab ill shift it over to be reimbursed later

NOT Short: This feels like an abuse of power but I'm not gonna complain

No Speak English: its on me guys hold on just deduct from this

Dyson Fan: are you sure we should be spending money for a foreign party, young lord?

No Speak English: its fine lan fan its only a couple of dollars

NOT short: HOW DO YOU HAVE THAT MUCH MONEY

No Speak English: yeah ok so the emperor before me was really fucking rich

NOT short: NO KIDDING

No Speak English: I like parties so yeah

No Speak English: dw about it doe

NOT short: ILL TRY

Bird: Colonel, Sir, are you getting decorations

Car: im doing PAPERWORK

Bird: iw ant everything done 2 days prior, 

No Speak English: Speaking of which ive rearranged my schedule so lan fan, mei and i can come over tomorrow

Bird: That is awesome! 

Car: leutenient pleaaasssseeeee

Bird: what is it sir

Car: let me off the hooookkk this one timmmeeeeee

Bird: …. alright

Car: tysm ilu

Bird: save it for later, Sir

No Speak English: :flushed: did i miss something

Bird: absolutely not. 

Car: :(

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> reminder about my tumblr please just say hi im lonely :')


	7. What fucking chapter is this

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [Havoc renamed the chat to Operation Royai]
> 
> Bread: I approve
> 
> Veto: Me as well
> 
> Twink: Yes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey please read for the end for a very important A/N! ty!!! <3

[Surprise party]  
(8:34pm June 21)

NOT short: Got the food

No Speak English: snacc

Dyson Fan: snacc?

No Speak English: yes, snacc

Cinnamon roll: luckythateddidnteatthis.jpg

Bird: That looks good! Nice job boys!

NOT short: Its getting late we are gonna head back to our hotel, sleep, and then grab a cab to central tomorrow

Bird: sounds good!

Cinnamon roll: See ya guys!

No Speak English: gn!

Dyson fan: gn!

[direct message between The Hawk’s eyes + Colonel]  
(12: 45 am june 22)  
The Hawk’s eyes: Go to sleep

Colonel: How did you know I wasn’t sleeping

The Hawk’s eyes: Go. To. Sleep. You have work tomorrow sir, and a long day ahead of you

Colonel: fine

Colonel: ill sleep

The Hawk’s eyes: Thank you sir.  
(12:56)  
Colonel: oh, and

The Hawk’s Eyes: what is it Sir?

Colonel: Thanks

Colonel: For checking up on me

The Hawk’s Eyes: Oh

The Hawk’s Eyes: You’re welcome, sir. Now get some rest. 

[Stale Chips]  
June 22, 11:43am)

(Havoc Changed “Dog Persons” name to “Twink”)

Twink: uh

Twink: what

Havoc: :) much better

Bread: Gonna have to agree with Havoc, sorry fuery

Twink: uh ok

Havoc: but actually, has anyone noticed boss unusually happy today

Twink: yeah =-= kinda sus is he alright?

Bread: Not sure, but he’s happy, and actually doing his paperwork today, so i'm taking that as a good sign. 

[Havoc renamed the chat to Operation Royai]

Bread: I approve

Veto: Me as well

Twink: Yes

Veto: But what about anti-Fraternization laws? We can’t have them court marshalled

Bread: Thats very tru, but Mustangs gonna be furher soon im assuming 

Havoc: Yeah, current Furher is Grumman, and Grumman is an actual cool guy (Unlike Bradley) and I wouldn’t be surprised if he plans to have Mustang become the next Furher, 

Twink: Rumor has it that Mustang should be getting a promotion soon

Veto: Really? Thats actually really cool

Havoc: and, best of all, Mustang as Furher can probably just throw the Anti-Fraternization law right out the window, that law is ages old and useless anyway

Bread: That idea sounds awesome,

Havoc: and then i can date rebecca catalina

Twink: …

Twink: I always feel like you have your own agenda havoc

Havoc: ;)

Bread: Alright, i am so fucking stoked for that day

Twink: I have to agree, that law is pretty dumb anyway

Veto: So now bets have been placed, do we just wait

Twink: For the party? Im assuming yeah, I feel like we should help out

Bread: Yeah ill check in on our bigger chat

[The Mustgang]  
12:05pm))

Bread: Hey boss, is there anything we can do to help set up for winry’s thing

Boss man: Naw I think you guys are good

Bread: U sure?

Boss man: yeah we should be set

Bread: alright

[Surprise Party]  
June 22 4:31pm)

No Speak English: Plane just landed, Lan Fan, Mei and I are at the airport at central 

Bird: Do I need to pick you guys up

NOT short: Actually I think its better if I do, im technically on leave from the promised day so im not on active duty, I don't want you and Mustang to get in trouble

Bird: Alright, just dont cause an accident

NOT short: ok MOM

NOT short: Ill be there in 30 to 40 minutes

No Speak English: sounds fine, we still need to go through immigration checks, baggage claim, ect

NOT short: I cant believe you guys didn’t take the private jet

No Speak English: Im not really supposed to be here anyway and I dont want to cause a scene

Car: DID YOU SNEAK OFF FOR A FOREIGN PARTY

No Speak English: maybe

Car: shit im gonna get in so much trouble 

Bird: this is my responsibility more than anything, sir, this is my fault

No Speak English: Excuse me guys but no, I came here for my own free will, anyway I’m sure the council can manage things back home

Cinnamon Roll: Council? Isn’t xing ruled by an emperor?

Car: Ling actually converted it to a democracy to try to avoid family feuds.

Cinnamon Roll: Really? Thats awesome ling! 

No Speak English: oh ty!

No Speak English: Gotta blast, ill talk to you guys in like 40 minutes when im in the car w Ed

Bird: Sir

Bird: I see you smiling, please do not make a pun 

Car: fine, 

Cinnamon Roll: What is there left to do? 

Bird: Colonel bought decorations, the complex has already been rented out, Im going to start putting them up after work today, Ill see you then

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! Im really sorry for the absence. I may be putting this fic off for like 2 weeks. Ive been feeling the big sad lately. IM WORKING ON A NEW FIC THO DONT GIVE UP ON ME YET
> 
> Wanted to leave you with a slightly longer chapter!
> 
> OK so about that new fic: Im trying to do a smol (maybe 5 work series) on works (approx 2k words or more) inspired by some good songs i have downloaded (no, im sorry, not bassboosted Monsters Inc this time). Ive done like 2.5k words for the first one, I did decide the song and I want to say im 75% done with it? I still need to do editing too, maybe will publish this Wensday or earlier. It will be titled "Melancholy Kaleidoscope", based on a fucking AWESOME song by All Time Low. That is my only spoiler for now, but for reference, my personal preferences for the fics i write are for them to be mostly canon-divergent or canon-complient (I do my best to avoid huge world-altering AUs). Please watch for it ive been dedicating way too much time on it :P
> 
> Thank you guys, and as a reminder you can come chat with me on tumblr! 
> 
> I have exactly one (1) follower whos my irl friend whos there because he is somewhat part of the fandom oop  
> <3 anyway! Ty loves and I hope you have a wonderful evening


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